


Falling

by ZaaraWatson



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-02
Updated: 2018-12-02
Packaged: 2019-09-05 19:16:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16816777
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZaaraWatson/pseuds/ZaaraWatson
Summary: „Why didn’t you tell me?“ he asked he did not knew exactly why, but the words did leave his mouth before he could think of them carefully. Sherlock snorted.„Because you scared the shit out of me, Watson.“ John could not help but smile.





	Falling

**Author's Note:**

> My first English one, well hell my first published one. I hope the mistakes are not to obvious. Bare with me ;-)

„Sherlock!“ he heard his best friends laugh in his ears and that made him giggle too. 

„Sherlock!“ he tried again „You need a shave.“ Sherlock’s lips reached his neck and he used his lips to make John silent for a minute.

„But you love it.“ Sherlock growled, between kisses. Oh yes, John really did. He had to smile a little at the fact that he did. John melted into the kiss like this was the last thing he ever wanted to do. No more breathing, no more talking, no more anything, just kissing Sherlock Holmes.

Their eyes locked as they broke the kiss both gasping for air. Their foreheads touched as Sherlock spoke.

„I love you, I always have. I wanted to tell you so many times but I did not. I am sorry. I was such a coward.“ John kissed him again to leave no doubt in Sherlock’s head, about his love.

„Why didn’t you tell me?“ he asked he did not knew exactly why, but the words did leave his mouth before he could think of them carefully. Sherlock snorted.

„Because you scared the shit out of me, Watson.“ John could not help but smile.

_Watson_.

It would sound strange for anyone else to call him that while sharing such an intimate moment together. But for them it meant friendship, trust, passion and love. 

„Oi, how did I possibly did scare a mad genius like you, Holmes?“ The taller man had to laugh again and this made Johns heart jump in affection. He reached out his hand and moved a mop of curls away from Sherlock’s eyes. Those glowing wonderful eyes he could get lost in and in this moment they have been so full, full of love and desire. 

„Because....“ Sherlock bit his lip and broke the gaze for a moment „ I have never felt like this for someone and I never thought you would fall for me too. Well you made it clear several times that you are not interested.“

Johns heart stopped for a second.

„Because I was falling deep the first day we met. You have been amazing. And god help me, the most beautiful creature I have ever seen.“

Sherlock raised an eyebrow. John cupped his head between his hands and continued to speak. 

„I was so afraid and alone I was just happy you have been there. I did not want to ruin everything by being lovers. Or starting a relationship.....“

John took a deep breath and was fighting back tears,

„I am not good at them. Relationships, I mean. And I could not loose you. Ever.“

Sherlock’s face lit up and they kissed again. Sherlock kissed his cheeks, his neck, his chest. He was kissing his way down again like he did before. Like he wanted to consume all of John Watson. Over and over and over again. John would let him. He needed him. He wanted to be close and closer to Sherlock Holmes but he knew no matter what they would do, it would never be close enough. He moaned very loud under the release of his climax so loud that it seemed echoing all the way down Baker Street. 

Sherlock wrapped his arms around Johns waist as tightly as John would let him and he rubbed his nose against his friends neck and got a humming sound in response.

„I love you John. I always have. I am sorry I haven’t told you. And I won’t.“

„Hmmm?“ John was about to drift in a boneless sleep but still very aware of what Sherlock was saying.

„Leave you, ever. And if it happens and I am not with you...I will be forced to do it.“John curled up some more into Sherlock’s arms before he fell asleep.

_„John? John? John!“_

„Sherlock!“ He screamed into the night. Sweat was on his forehead, his breathing was unsteady, so was his heartbeat. It was dark. He looked at the other side of the bed. Nobody was there. He was gone. He was gone since 2 months now. John was sleeping in Sherlock’s bed since he jumped off the roof of St. Barts. He did not knew why he slept here. But he felt close to his best friend this way. He knew it was not good if he wanted to get over it.

But he did not want to get over it. He doesn’t want to forget.

„I love you Sherlock Holmes. I always have.“ hot burning tears did run over his face, again.

„I am sorry I have never told you when I had the chance. God I miss you. I miss you so much.“ he fell back in the pillows sobbing into the night like he always did the past two months after the fall.

Regretting that he never told Sherlock Holmes he was falling for him the first night they met.


End file.
